3:00 p.m. Blog Blog Blog

I am blogging again because I can't sit down. No, I can sit down, but I can't sit still. Except, that's not right either. I can sit down, sit still, but my mind can't. So it took me 2 hours to take a shower. One hour, in which, I almost got to the shower, but took a call from my mother instead, because she called, and e-mailed, and sent a package, and was worried. I let my mother talk for a little, saying what I think are appropriate things to say, "Well, that's good," "Okay," "I e-mailed you," "Mmhm, concrete walls," the last because she says her phone connection isn't very good where she works.

Then I'm taking over the conversation as soon as I'm given a chance, and I'm talking and talking and on the edge of my seat with the need to talk. I'm talking over her, around her, only half listening, though I think she needs to be heard, too, like me. We're both unstable in our own ways.

Then it's back to breakfast, to pick at crumbs, and somewhere in there, I turn the shower on, but then I think I'll re-read my blog today, to prep for the psych, and so I do that, listening to the shower run the whole time I'm also looking up the directions on how to get to my psych's office. I find them and think, "Of course! I knew that," and still the water is running, so that has to be attended to, I think, and I'm in the shower. The shower is too quiet, so I put on Paul Simon, which is the only thing in the cd player by the shower, and if I get out to find something else, it'll be another 30m before I get back to the shower, so I'm singing and dancing in the shower, and singing and dancing, and thinking everyone in the hall passing can no doubt hear me, but oh well.

And then I'm out, and right back to the blogging, and can you believe it? I forgot what bus to take to the psych's. So I'm looking it up again. And ping! There's an IM, but it's just a line, and my IMer is off again, but I can't help msg'ing back the ghost of a friend, using too many lines and exclamation marks for someone who isn't there, and if I were talking right now, I know it'd be a touch too loud, and there'd be much gesticulation, but I keep it all in, because I always have, so I talk too loud in my head and prance around like an overactive puppy at my mind's heels.